Back to Idaho

It has been a month since I've been home, I guess it is about time that I do an update.

Last month I was living in one of the largest cities in the world where people are out and about until five in the morning, where I could run downstairs to the Kimbap shop at midnight and be served. I lived on the fifth floor of a small, but nice, studio apartment, and I worked at a frustrating, but never boring, job.

This month, I live in one of the smallest towns in the world (ok, there are smaller), people disappear after six, and restaurants and grocery stores close at eight. I also live with my parents, in my old room, which has been mostly taken over by my mom's hobbies.

Needless to say, I am quite bored and at times, have trouble adjusting to life back at home.

At the same time, I am having a great time at home.  The bed is soft, there is a dryer, I have an oven, I work for Dad, so I can go to work in my pajamas if I wish. I can also easily take off a day or two to visit friends in Moscow. I can enjoy Moscow without having to worry about making it to class the next day!

Seattle

I went to Seattle the first week of September. That was my first sight-seeing trip to the Emerald City. It was great to catch up with my friend and her family. Jess's cousin took us to see night views of the troll, the lights reflecting on the sound, the Space Needle, fire dancers, and the Boeing airfield. We got up early the next morning in time to see the sun rise over Lake Washington, then we combed the local area malls, where Jess and Bec had their first taste of Vietnamese food (it wasn't a hit).

Hammering Man

We stopped in at a local brewery went to see the hammering man (found several cities in the world, including Seoul). We then prepped ourselves for a terrifying night ghost tour of Pike Place. Not really worth the money, but the history of serial killers was interesting and we'll never look too closely at the Pike Place morgue again.

Troll in Seattle

I've been up to Moscow twice to see friends. The trips were filled with hiking, drinking, dancing, and music. It was great to be back at Uni, feeling like a college student. I pretended to be a student long enough to crash the job fair.

The fires have calmed down a bit, but there is still a lot of smoke in the air and a lot of dust. Apparently, Idaho has gone over six months without rain. Temperatures have dropped drastically and I have re-discovered why most of my wardrobe consists of winter clothes. I desperately want to escape the winter weather!

As for now, I am looking for jobs overseas. I have had a couple of interviews and we'll see where that takes me. I've also been toying with going back to school for a Masters. We'll see.

I'm so excited! I just can't hide it! You know, you know Gyeongju! (Part two)

After resting in Seoul for a day, we headed down to Gyeongju. Yes, we finally made it! We found ourselves a cheap love motel for the night, and headed out to explore the city center. The city is built around grassy burial mounds. One is on display to the public.

We then wound our way to the famous observatory. In promotional photos this tower looks quite tall. Imagine our dismay when it turns out to be only a few meters tall and the cost to go stand in front of the tower is about $2.50/person. Instead we snapped our photos from afar and enjoyed the free beauty of the sunset, trees, large fields of lowers, and large ponds full of blooming lotus flowers.

Tombs. 

We followed the map to another famous photo spot, Anapji Pond. We arrived at dark, the peek tourist time to take photos of the pagodas on the water. Exhausted by our several hours' walk, we caught a cab to our motel and feasted on water, soda crackers, and bananas.

Field of flowers and sunset.

The next morning we packed our bags and headed for Bulguksa, an old temple. It looked much like all of the other temples in Korea. And it is arguable if it is worth the four dollars per person to see it. And no photos are allowed of Buddha. Some what disappointed and very hot, we decided to skip the hike to the Seokguram Grotto and took the bus up the winding mountain road. Unfortunately it started raining so the legendary view of the ocean was blocked. But we hiked our way up to the Grotto, to a Buddha that looked like any other Buddha and again, no photos. But plenty of overpriced and badly taken photos were for sale at the stall below the grotto. It is funny how commercialism creeps it's way even to the most humble religions.

Back in Gyeongju, we grabbed ourselves a coffee and decided to catch the next bus out of town, which turned out to be the bus to Busan. We easily found a cheap-ish love motel near Haeundae Beach (One of the most famous mainland beaches in Korea). And I mean, cheaper than regular family hotels and cleaner than either family or love motels we've seen in Korea. It was the perfect love motel with dim red lights, a round bed, a condom next to the bed, lotions, oils, a large computer, and a large TV set to the Japanese porn channel.



We decided to buck the traditional love motel activities and instead walked around Haeundae Beach and watched a large crowd gathered in front of a stage that had a movie screen and a few speakers. The speakers played K-pop and the screen played beer commercials while everybody just watched, didn't dance. Very surreal.

Yonggunsa

We left the zombie crowd and found the 90s rap crowd (Korean rap is still a baby, hence the 90s refernce), the non-descript flute solo, some drums, and a few other performances that were actually quite impressive, considering this kind of thing rarely happens in Seoul.

The next day we packed up, ate breakfast on the beach, and then headed up to Haedong Yonggunsa, a temple built next to the ocean. Again, it is just another Korean temple. But this one is free and has better views of the ocean, plus some slightly difference Buddhist idols to take photos of.

We were rained off the beach and so caught the bus back to Seoul. We spent the next day hiding from more rain and dreaming of the beaches of Jeju and the forest and flower fields of Gyeongju.

We Just Love Having You Here

Skipping the Philippines and going to Jeju for the summer holiday turned out to be the best thing in the end. One, we missed out on all the flooding in the Philippines. Two, we got to see the best place in Korea.

Everyone seemed surprised that we were going to spend five whole days on the island. Turns out, that almost wasn’t enough! Perhaps, if you have your own vehicle it would be enough, but we took taxis and buses the whole way.

Seogwipo Harbor.

We arrived in Jeju City on August third, and took an Airport Limousine down to Seogwipo in the south. We found our hostel above a 7-Eleven across the road from the ocean. We immediately started exploring the area, walking the famous Olleh Road that goes from West to East along the coast. We stopped at Sojeongbang Falls, a small waterfall. We only stayed a few minutes because the tide was coming in and the waves were splashing up the cliffs. We thought we had better take the cues from the cockroaches and run up the mountain

After filling ourselves up on black pig BBQ and beer, we passed out in our bunks, only to rise early and most literally, climb into town to find an open coffee shop.  It made the hill on Home Street seem like an ant hill, especially without coffee! Once armed with coffee, we walked to Cheonjiyeon Falls, around the harbor, crossed over the bridge shaped like a sail, and onto Saeseom Island (nothing special, just more walkways).

We then hiked back up to Jeongbang Falls, only to climb down several steps. But it was worth it in the end, as we got to play in the falls and walk to where it flows out into the ocean. It was a great break from the heat of the island.

But we could not escape the heat, so we headed to Swesokak black beach, a pool blocked off from the ocean. While swimming, we marveled and how naked we felt in our bathing suits next to the fully dressed Koreans swimming about (every beach was like this, Koreans fully dressed in shorts, long-sleeved shirts, and sunhats swimming in the ocean).

Our next adventure was exploring the south west area of the island. We walked around the World Cup Stadium, a surprisingly beautiful building for Korea. We then got back on the Airport Limousine bus to go to Jungmun Beach. We stopped along the way to see Cheonjeyeon Falls. We stumbled back to the main part of town to scarf down a burger before trying to find our way to the beach, which turned out to be quite difficult. But once we found it, we had a blast riding the waves on the innertube, despite my taking out an entire family and getting caught in the buoy rope.

A man helped us get to Jeju City and found us a guest house in Samyang Black Beach. Samyang is famous for its sunsets, and it does have some beautiful sunsets! We enjoyed taking morning swims at Samyang and night-time strolls along the beach, avoiding the buried old people soaking their arthritic joints.

Sunset at Samyang

Our third full day in Jeju was spent exploring LoveLand, the sex-themed park. Which was surprisingly tame and, not surprisingly, very Korean. We then met up with one of my friends for dinner at Bagdad Indian Restaurant where we had a traditional Chinese tea for desert, compliments of the owner.  

The next day we awoke early and headed east to Manjanggul Cave. The bus ride is surprisingly long, for such a small island. The bus dropped us off about two kilometers from the entrance of the cave and we stubbornly refused the “expensive” taxis. We spent one kilometer questioning the sanity of the American who was trying to hitchhike in Korea, until she actually caught a ride and was kind enough to offer to share the car with us. Unfortunately, there wasn’t any room. But shortly after, a nice couple stopped and gave us a ride to the caves.

Manjanggul is a lava cave going 1 km into the island. It is very open, very well lit, and very touristy. We braved the cold and the damp and managed to make it to the end of the cave. After catching a small lunch of kimbap, we headed to the neighboring maze park.

We then relaxed our aching limbs at Hamdeok Beach. This beach was the best in terms of waves, but was very crowded and full of seaweed. We suffered some minor cuts and bruises from the sand and smashing into other ring-riders.

Our last full day in Jeju, we decided to try out the famous Hallim Beach to the west. We got distracted for four hours in the Hallim Tropical Park—a large botanical garden, including two lava caves. One cave is the only cave in the world where limestone and lave meet. Suddenly we remembered our main purpose for the trip and headed to the beach. It was a beautiful beach with sea-green waters and black lava rocks jutting out of the water. But those black lava rocks were under the water too, and very, very sharp. In a short time, I was cut from head to toe from the rocks, so we escaped back to Jeju City.

Beautiful beach, painful rocks!

In those five days we didn’t get to climb Hallasan nor did we go further east to Udo. We were sad to see Jeju in the plane window and even more depressed to say goodbye to the bright blue skies and green waters when we arrived in grey, depressing Seoul.   

English Camp Sports' Day Misadventures

Every lesson I have a group of students who are bandaged, bruised, or encased in plaster. I have always wondered if students are just incredibly daring, brittle, or uncoordinated. Judging from what I saw today at the English camp sports' day, daring applies to very few students. For children who begin learning taekwondo as soon as they can stand, these children have the slowest reflexes and the most uncoordinated bodies ever.

Now, I admit that I throw like a girl (I am not talking about softball pitchers). I hate running, my right leg comes up when I shoot a basket, and I am not about to get close to a sweaty armpit to intercept a ball. Also, my depth perception tends to be quite off and my reflexes tend to be a bit slow of late. So keep in mind, that this story is coming from me.

Today was rainy, so we had to stay indoors in the ancient gym on the 4th floor. This gym is long and narrow with splintering wood floors that give way too much for comfort. There is a stage at one end, with a projector and a sound system, student artwork attached to tacked up metal cages lines the walls on either side, ceiling fans hang down way too low, and hundreds of chairs are shoved to the back wall. I was very shocked to find out that this gym is still used as a gym.  

The first event was dodge ball. We used one soft ball. In the Korean version, as far as I can gather, the ball is thrown up by the referee and it volleyed by the team captions to their team. You are safe if you catch the ball or the ball bounces before hitting you. If you get hit (before the ball bounces) or drop the ball, you are out. If you are out you go behind the opposing team and if the ball crosses the line, you can throw the ball and try to get the opposing team members out. 

So, Matt and I painfully watched as fifteen screeching, cowering students rushed from one end of the gym to the other in one large huddle trying to escape the one ball. Once in a while a student was brave enough to try to catch the ball, but did not often succeed. Many times they dropped it and then proceed to fall over it. If they managed to catch it, the students either hit their own teammate in the head or hit the wall (knocking off the racks holding the artwork). And none of the students seemed to realize that they needed to take the good throwers out first.  

I don't know how many times, the children were saved from outs because they tried to dodge, tripped and some how the ball managed to brush between their legs instead. And just like in a cartoon, the student put their heads between their legs to make sure the ball really did pass through. This made their butts perfect targets for the good players. It would have been funny, if it hadn't been so painful to watch.

The next event was team jump rope. Since one boy got injured by the soft dodge ball and was laid up with a heat patch on his bicep, I stepped in. I haven't done team jump rope since I was 10. But, it was like riding a bike and I did quite well. So well in fact, that my shoes came off and I landed on the floor barefoot, receiving a pretty gnarly hunk of wood through my foot, thus ending my short-lived jumping career.

I have never seen a group of elementary students so bad at jump rope, they cannot turn the rope or jump. I don't know how many students were strangled. A rope ended up wrapped in the ceiling fan (with the student frantically turning in circles trying to untangle the fan, only managing to make himself dizzy and the rope even more tangled). Needless to say, Double Dutch was out of the question. 

Pre-Vacation

Matt surprised me by knocking on my door Thursday evening immediately after I had finished cooking dinner--talk about great timing for him! I put him to work on Friday by making him attend summer camp where I played scientist. I blindfolded a student, hid a piece of candy in the room and made the other students give the child directions through a maze of desks to find the candy. Turns out, the kids really will play this lousy game over and over for a worthless piece of candy.

My apartment is out there...

After camp, we headed to Myeongdong for some shopping and then to Jonggak for some Indian food. Saturday we decided it was high time to go to Namsan Tower. We skipped the Teddy Bear Museum inside the tower and headed for the observation room. We rode up six whole floors in an elevator that had an animation of flying through the tower, out of its top and into outer space. It was quite something and left all the westerners giggling.

Seoul Tower

We declined the 12,000 won green-screened photo and attempted to look out over the city. Unfortunately, the smog and the lack of recent window cleaning made for poor visibility, but it was still nice to look over a part of the city. We then looked around the many gift shops selling tower cell phone charms, vials with silk flowers surrounding miniature towers, eyeglass cleaning clothes with the tower printed on them, and overpriced cardboard coasters depicting the tower. Oh, and I must not forget the souvenirs from England and Paris. Korea really doesn't understand the whole souvenir thing.
After the tower, I took Matt to his first Outback Steakhouse. He had his first true bowl of soup and bit of steak in one year. A small plate of cheap steak, steamed veggies, fries and some pumpkin soup never tasted so good! We topped off the decadent day by catching the late show to the new Batman movie. The movie would have been more enjoyable if people could leave their hand phones alone for a few minutes.
Sunday found us back in Myeongdong where we stumbled upon an arts and crafts sale. We hung out listening to a guitarist and I managed to find something crafty that I actually liked. We later headed to Kongdae to eat some BBQ pork with Matt's Korean friend from Jinbo.
Matt followed me to English camp today, lured by the hope of playing kickball. But sadly, it rained and so events were moved to the gym. This deserves its own blog post. I have since sent Matt back to Cheongsong where he can go back to work and prepare for our week in Jeju.

How Many People Does it Take to Change a Light Bulb?

In the western world we have the light bulb jokes.  We tell them and chuckle. But here, it’s no laughing matter. It’s reality. So how many people does it take to change a Korean light bulb?

            

Well, first, I have seven light switches in my tiny studio apartment. It makes it nice and bright, but eventually one of the 30-something light bulbs is going to burn out. Curiosity caused me to unscrew one of the light fixtures to find a Christmas-light-like bulb held in by two screws. I know what you are thinking, WHY!?! Don't think about it, it will only cause your brain to overheat. 

The first bulb to go out was the bathroom light. Being a person from the western world, where any store has a whole isle dedicated to various light bulbs, I assumed that this light bulb could be purchased at the big shopping center. As you may recall in Matt's blog post, he took on this task for me. He took the light bulb to the shopping center and asked the sales associate for the light bulb. It was the wrong one. Luckily, they did take the light bulb back. So after wasting  several hours on this task, Matt finally gave up and asked maintenance. In the end, it only took one person to change the light bulb. But the question remains, why does it take maintenance to change a 60 Watt bulb!?!

The next light to go out was the kitchen light. Placed strategically above the sink very close to the cabinets. I would have gladly ignored it, but it is florescent and does that whole blinky thingy. So 10:30 at night, I climb up onto the counter and set about trying to figure out how to get the apparently simple light cover off. After fifteen minutes, the light cover finally came loose, flying across the room and nearly knocking me off the counter. Then there was a mass of wires and electrical boxes inside the light--it cannot be a simple florescent light. After finally figuring out how to unplug the light. I tried to then put the light cover back on. The light cover is held onto the fixture by dime-sized magnets. But the magnets are not attached to the light cover in any way. So ten minutes of struggling to get the cover to defy gravity failed. Again I need maintenance or a strong man to hammer the light fixture to the ceiling.

So in conclusion to this riddle, it takes only one person to change a light bulb, if you just realize that you cannot be independent in this country and have to call for help.

In other complaining news, last month the school had the brick walkways redone. For an entire month the pavement was torn up. And carefully relaid and torn up again. The problem wasn't leveling, as all leveling seems to be absent and makes keeping your feet dry in this monsoon impossible. Also, they are redoing the walls around the building, taking down the white wrought- iron fence and building a "pretty" brick fence. Except, the brick layers seem to forgotten the spade to smooth out the grout and the brick fence can now be described as "goopy." 

This week has been English Certification Week. Basically, students memorize English and Korean phrases on a paper. I point to a Korean phrase and the students must translate it to English. If they translate three phrases correctly, they can go onto the Korean teacher who says the phrase in English and the student must translate it into Korean. This is always exhausting as you hear the same phrases butchered. But this is even more exhausting as you have thirty children lined up shoving each other, hitting each other, screaming at each other, and trying to give answers to the students taking the test. I spend more time trying to get the students to calm down for five seconds than actually giving the test. 

I also spend most of the time chasing away students who have no sense of respect for their teachers' possessions or space. As I am giving this test, students walk up and start going through my pencil cup, taking whatever they want, taking the scissors and cutting whatever is available on my desk (thank god I caught a student before cutting my new headphones), hitting the keys on my keyboard to see what I have up on the computer (and slamming the keyboard when the password prompt comes up), trying to pull my headphones out of the computer from the head phone themselves, oh and unplugging the monitor from the back. These are supposedly the wholesome Korean kids, mind you.

The rising water has forced the drunks to the top of the bridge.

As you can tell, today is a day I am done with the rude children, the USA shirts that are colored with Korean flag colors, the inability to wipe up urine and poop, and just the general confusing Korean attitude of desperately trying to make a dime and not caring how many dollars they lose trying to make that dime. Perhaps the fact that the sun hasn't shown in a week and the rain hasn't stopped for a day and a half has something to do with my attitude.

As Ordinary as Apple Pie

Another weekend in Cheong-song. Helped Matt with English camp. We broke from the ordinary Cheong-song weekend to visit the neighboring town of Jinbo and celebrate its fireworks festival. We spent the evening wandering around tables filled with hamsters, goldfish, and light-up wands or bow headbands. Then we lounged at one of the many food stalls set up among the jungle gyms and swing sets while enjoying the taste of beer, the sounds of local karaoke talent, the sights of the fireworks,  and the smells of roasting corn, deep-fried corn dogs, kimchi, and steaming silkworm larvae. The rest of the weekend was spent hiding from the first monsoon rains pouring down upon Cheong-song and the giant spiders that were washed out of their hiding places.

Seoul, meanwhile, has spent an entire week steaming in preparation for the monsoon (which will come this weekend). Crops outside of Seoul are suffering from the drought while children inside of Seoul seem to gain power from the drought. It was a long week as the children literally ran around the classroom screaming, using their books as bludgeoning devices and megaphones, throwing spit balls at each other and much more. There are quite a few black and blue faces, swollen lips, and ace bandages. Students took the standardized tests on Tuesday, making it the perfect day for us subject teachers. But by Wednesday the stress of studying left the children in a frenzy. 

By the end of the week, I had had it with students' tantrums, whining, screaming, and just all things related to students. I was also irritated by the fact that among other annoying news, my cat died and I found out I have to move out of my apartment the day my contract ends and I have to be at school. And suddenly, everyone notifies me of all the things that have to be done now.  But this is ordinary. Just as it is ordinary to go to the bathroom and hear several girls in the stall next to you. I honestly don't know how they all fit in there, as the stalls aren't that big. But the lack of a western toilet probably gives some extra space.

The nice toilets in the school.

Finally, the after school classes are finished!  And to celebrate the coming monsoon (Koreans hate rain, so I don't know why they are celebrating this), my co-teachers bought their first apple pie. I showed up to their classroom to find them staring at the Costco pie (quite large) with puzzled expressions.

"Do you know how to cut this?" They asked. I repressed a giggle and told them to cut it like a pizza.

"Oh. Oops." Worried looks.

"How did you cut it?" I asked.

"Like the top." (checker pattern crust) "We can't take it out of the plate." This time I giggled, especially as they were trying to dislodge a piece from the middle of the pie with a paring knife. I carefully dished the square pie pieces onto foil squares and we enjoyed the teachers' first taste of apple pie. I then answered questions about how many people the pie would feed in America and how many apples are needed for the pie and if I knew how to make apple pies and what other kinds of pies there are in America. And I discovered that one teacher had wanted to taste an apple pie ever since watching "American Pie." I am still confused about this reasoning...

Tempers and Temperatures on the Rise

Rice paddies

English camp is next month and I am scrambling to get things done in time. I am putting way more effort into this than the previous camp. Mainly because this year's students  have a short attention span--so every minute must be planned for, or I will lose them. Also I must have an activity every few minutes otherwise, they're gone. I am also losing valuable planning time messing with Hangul Word Processor. It is worse than Word, if that is possible. And of course the two programs are not compatible, so formatting gets altered between copying and pasting. I must use this HWP because none of the other teachers know how to use Word (which is in Konglish, not English or Korean).

Also taking up much of my time are long teacher's meetings dealing with the growing problem of bullying. My co-teachers feel I must attend these entirely Korean meetings. Oddly enough, I am the only one paying attention to these meetings as the other teachers  are playing games on their smart phones, texting, answering their phones, or sleeping. I'm beginning to see where the children get their short attention spans.

The vice principal finally got involved with discipline when a sixth grader punched a third grader and measures are being taken to limit interaction between sixth and third grades. Though, no one seems to care to grasp the root of the problem. Nor do teachers seem to care when students shove, kick, and ostracize a student because they think they will catch her down syndrome.

There is a new student in second grade. She does not look 100% Korean and I hope the students don't single her out because of it.  This student's English is better than most of my sixth grade students and she is always happy to speak with me.

More and more students frequent my classroom to practice their English. Most days, I spend a couple of hours helping students with their homework or playing games with them. The older girls show me the latest K-Pop male bands, and the young students bring me gifts of  Angry Bird erasers, wilted flowers, strange insects, green apricots, grape-flavored candy,  and cough drops (which I give to the older students).

Last week, an acquaintance from Pullman camped out on my floor. The doormen in my building were not too impressed with this new guy. I presume they thought  I was cheating on Matt. I honestly don't know who they think Matt is. So for my reputation's sake and my possible fake marriage's sake, I had better not have any more males in my apartment.

This weekend I went to Cheong-Song to visit Matt. It was a much needed weekend in the country with blue (yes blue!!!) skies and somewhat fresh air (minus the smells of the open sewage in town). I ended up helping Matt with his English camp on Saturday. It reminded me of our certification days. And it was kind of fun interacting with middle school and high school kids.

We spent the rest of the weekend hanging out at the river watching the fish jump and the old people do this odd kimchi squat walk in the water with their heads in glass-bottomed dishes (third-world goggles?) picking up snails along the river bottom.

       This weekend I went to Cheong-Song to visit Matt. It was a much needed weekend in the country with blue (yes blue!!!) skies and somewhat fresh air (minus the smells of the open sewage in town). I ended up helping Matt with his English camp on Saturday. It reminded me of our certification days. And it was kind of fun interacting with middle school and high school kids.

       We spent the rest of the weekend hanging out at the river watching the fish jump and the old people do this odd kimchi squat walk in the water with their heads in glass-bottomed dishes (third-world goggles?) picking up water snails along the river bottom. I am guessing they were dinner.

      Temperatures are up to the 90s with high humidity as the monsoon pushes it's way through the country heading towards Seoul. It is making places like Cheong-Song and Seoul feel like a kettle on a stove.

(I am sorry for the retarded highlighting. It seems that Blogger is once again stupid and refusing to take away the highlighting that I did not select in the first place). 

Having a Ball

Matt was lucky enough to have a five day weekend because of a school birthday in the same week as Korean Memorial day. So, I enjoyed having a roommate for five days during the first weekend in June. We started off Matt's five-day weekend at his first baseball game. We watched the LG Twins. The fans seemed to be sporadic in cheering, mostly checking their smart phones until something major happened, such as a hit, or more likely, a "base on balls" (a walk). In fact, they seemed to consume so much energy cheering at the walks that when the Twins won, fans let out a small cheer and quickly vacated the stadium leaving Matt and I to take our victory photos in peace.

The next day, Matt finally convinced me to go to the amusement park, Lotte World. It is a rip off of Disney Land in miniature (even the sign has the Disney castle on it). You will find that the Adventures of Sinbad ride resembles a much shorter version of Pirates of the Caribbean and that The Pharaoh's Revenge is a minute version of Indiana Jones, to name a couple of examples. However, unlike Disney Land, Lotte World sits on the third floor of a Lotte shopping mall, with most of the rides inside (including a roller coaster). The rest of the rides are located outside on a small island. The theme is supposedly a "medieval European village," and there are a couple of timber-framed buildings, a couple of fairy-tale castles, and a random mural of Spanish dancers in the bathroom, but mainly the theme is Ottoman or Persian with some 18th Century pirates thrown in along with the park mascot, which is some kind of raccoon. But like a good theme park, it feels as if you stepped off of the escalator into some fairy-tale book and it isn't hard to have fun. I really did enjoy myself, despite getting sick. And the fact that I just cannot do the high/fast rides, which puts quite a limit on my entertainment. Also the lines were about half an hour to fifty minutes long for such short rides. But like I said, it was fun! I also introduced Matt to the temporary healing wonders of Taco Bell.

Lotte World--photo by Matt

I went to work on Monday and Tuesday, while Matt ran errands around Seoul. He also found time to straighten the apartment, do the dishes,  and do some chores I had been procrastinating. It was so lovely to come home to a friend and a clean  place (thanks, Matt!). We spent the evenings wandering the city and playing Yahtzee.

By Thursday I was so sick that I finally went to the doctor. The Dr, convinced of a burst appendix, rushed me to X-rays and an intensive ultrasound,  only to discover that "Korea is stressful" for me and that I cannot eat the food here (duh on the food part).  So now I am on a strict diet of fruits and vegetables--so basically, bananas, tiny yellow melons, pineapple, green peppers. and cabbage. These are the only Carmen-friendly foods I am willing to pay for as cherries are over $10 for less than half a pound,  package of ten kiwis are $20,   watermelon is over $18, and green beans are $1 per bean, asparagus (very large and woody) is about $2 per stalk, and cauliflower and broccoli always seem to be mushy.

Matt came back on Friday, and we spent the weekend wandering around streets we had never explored and re-discovering the traditional market near my apartment. While wandering around the market, we discovered an adorably friendly, blue-eyed kitten. And because we spent so much time playing with the kitten in front of the nut-stall, we had to purchase some sunflower hearts from the stall-owner. We finally moved away from the cat to explore the Chinese medicine stalls, buckets of live turtles next to jumping eels, and Styrofoam coolers brimming with chicken feet lying next to hundreds of fly buzzing, skinned chickens lying under sun-beaten tarps. Luckily the smell of salted fish and steaming chickens was partially covered by hunch-backed ajumas peeling garlic amongst a mountain range of the reeking bulbs (impossible to capture on camera because of the sheer size of these piles in the tiny area and the fact that whole office spaces are buried in garlic).

We finished off the weekend with our first 4D movie. 4D, for those of you who do not know, is a 3D movie with moving seats, air bursts, water sprays, and light effects. Light effects were good and the moving seats, but the water was quite annoying as was the air bursts. However, when the alien jumped out at the movie star at the same time as the air hose whipped my leg quite painfully, I thought for sure an alien had bit me. I kicked my shoes, threw my 3D glasses, screeched, flew over the armrest, and landed in Matt's lap trying to save myself. It was quite embarrassing.

Not Such a Normal Week...

View from one summit.

Wednesday I went on a hike up Achasan, a mountain near my neighborhood. I went with my school. While it was nice to get out, it was quite terrifying to go on those trails with that many people. It was slick rock and loose sand the entire way with some extreme drop offs. Not a great place to be when you are in a pack of people who cannot decide if they want to be the tortoise or the hare and none of them can make that decision at the same time.

Only in Korea will you have a steep trail, filled with old people dressed in their nylon hiking gear, bright visor, two walking sticks, and a well-equipped back pack talking on their cell phones very loudly. And what is more embarrassing is that they make it up the mountain faster than me. In my defense, I stop to take pictures and to avoid getting killed by these crazy old people. At two points on the mountain, after a steep climb, there are outdoor gyms set up. So I guess, the hike is to get the heart rate going so you can do sit ups,  lift weights, and do the twist. Only in Korea. And it seems that only in Korea can I  awe the school by showing off my amazing fence climbing and razor-wire jumping skills when a group of teachers decided to off-trail it.

But the view was beautiful despite the cloud cover. We had  to take pictures for the Office of Education proving that we did go on a hike and that we weren't skirting our team-building duties. Then suddenly, the kind man who taught me how to use Korean chopsticks when I first arrived in Korea was taking my camera and taking pictures (which was nice because I never have pictures of me on my camera), but then I also had to take pictures together with him. He then helped all of us young teachers down the mountain and left the older teachers to struggle behind (but they actually beat us down the mountain).  We then waited as the "professional" hikers of the group airbrushed off their hiking boots at an air-brushing station, before heading to dinner of duck and bony pork comprised of fat and small bones. After I had spit out my eighth bone in two minutes, a  teacher thankfully mistook my answer to her question of "Do you get meat cuts like this in America?" to mean that the butcher would be sold out so fast he couldn't stay in business, rather than my literal meaning of a butcher wouldn't stay in business with cuts like this.

Almost to the top!

Thursday, I was greeted by a visit from the Home Science teacher from last year. She came to fill my co-teacher's place for a day. She has just landed a job on "Cable TV" (pronounced Kae buh luh tee wvee) (apparently that is the name of the news network), where she will be giving the stock reports.  Also, a blast from the past, I had my coffee date with another old co-teacher, where she showed me around more undiscovered parts of the city. We had a wonderful pasta dinner near Changdeokgung Palace. It was a dirty, run down cottage, but still quaint with it's bright yellow and red walls, mismatched tables and chairs, mismatched plates, and menus made from scrap books.

And today the whole busy week came crashing down into a bad mood for me. I was hit by a man on a bicycle, I had to deal with obnoxious students trying to take advantage of a substitute teacher. I got so angry that I went Hulk on a kid and the teachers could hear me down the hall. I was still fuming over terrible and unfinished homework when HyunSu brought in a kitten she had rescued from the road. He was such a darling black and white thing, covered in dirt and smelling of kimchi. Thankfully her mother said she could keep the cat, and she had just brought the cat in to show me. I held the cat and played with it while HyunSu finished a class and it was amazing how a short time with the cat made me feel much better.

Now I will prepare for five days of Matt, who has three days off of school plus the weekend! 

I'm so excited! I just can't hide it! You know, You know, Gyeongju!

Bongeunsa's Buddha

So that is what I decided this post would be named after returning from Gyeongju. However, like most of the trips I plan to do in Korea, it failed miserably.  Every thing actually worked out, except for the fact that all available transportation to get to Gyeongju was sold out for the entire weekend. Then trying to inform the hostel that I was not coming was a pain. Koreans must have the latest cell phones and so their cell phones change rapidly, and as I found out when my co-teacher changed her phone, the cell numbers change rapidly too and people cannot be bothered to change the information on emails and websites.

But in the end the three day weekend was great. Matt came to Seoul. We journeyed to Coex, a large underground mall which is the closest thing to Western shopping I've had since leaving the States. We walked around enjoying the various stores (which are still distinctly Korean) and killed nearly three hours in the very expensive aquarium. After emerging to grab a coffee we discovered Bongeunsa, apparently the richest temple in Seoul. It was quite beautiful decked out to welcome Buddha into the world.

Lanterns at Bongeunsa.

We journeyed to Myeongdong where Matt found a pair of jeans. We watched Men in Black 3 in 3D (might as well watch it in 2D). We wandered through Cheonggyecheon Museum (a museum on the demolishing of  Cheonggyecheon stream in the late 1970s by draining and turning it into a super highway, and then in late 1990s, making it back into a stream). By the way, this stream runs about a block and a half behind my apartment and is the stream running by Dongdaemun all the way to Jongno. It is the stream that has the winter lantern festival and the same stream that Matt fell into.

I had known Korea was poor, but I had no idea how poor the country was until seeing the pictures at the museum. It explains why there is still a third-world mind set to the older generations. 

Happy, Happy Birthday, Buddha!

            Seoul is bursting with colors these two weeks as the city celebrates Buddha's birthday. Lanterns hang in single file down my street. It is nice to see the pink, red, green, yellow, and blue in the daylight, but sadly, they are left unlit at night.

            To further celebrate the Great One's birthday, Seoul put on a lantern festival. We missed the cheer rally, but we did make it to Jogyesa Temple near Insadong to see millions of lanterns. It was quite a sight! Reds, whites, oranges, blues, yellows, and pinks blocked out the sky and danced above us. Lanterns hung inside the temple surrounding the three Buddhas. Heart-shaped lanterns surrounded the cement Korean Buddha and rows upon rows of yellow and blue lanterns lay on tables to be given out for free to those who wanted to wait in line and carry them about the city.

            I was lazy, and we didn't wait in line. But previously, Matt and I had elbowed our way into a craft table and had made our own lotus lantern out of a paper cup and crepe paper (which was the envy of all the Waygooks). And we had already carried this lantern through Insadong, and the palace and Blue House neighborhoods.

            After exploring these areas and taking way too many photos of lanterns, we made our way back to Jonggak to claim our space to watch the parade. An hour and a half later the parade finally made it to Jonggak. It was quite impressive with the large amount of small lanterns and enormous detailed lanterns. But it was also kind of boring (we didn't know anyone in the parade).  So we made it through about two hours before our feet gave out and I had had it with the ajuma trying to set fire for hundreds of people with her stupid lanterns. So we left and got a drink at "Ho Bar." When we came out of Ho Bar, the parade was still going! But we left any way and spent the rest of the night nursing our tired feet.

  No new sightings of possible stocker... the hair must have came from something else. Matt made cracks about my being a 90s child because of my elaborate and creative booby traps that Maccaulay Culkin would be proud of. But I still jump and go running for a weapon every time someone slides an advert on my door or anytime the neighbors start screaming at each other.

            The students I had previously written about have given me a nickname. Apparently, it is Halmeoni, meaning Grandmother. Because my name is "Calmenie" it rhymes with "Halmeoni." I told them to change it and taught them the "Karma Chameleon." I don't mind being Karma or Chameleon as long as I am not Grandma! 

            Trying to get a student to say "Speaking. Who is calling, please" was quite the comedic moment. I'd say "Repeat after me, 'speaking.'" And the student would look at me and wait for me to say the phrase. And I said "no you say, 'speaking'" and the student asked "Teacher, speaking what!?!" Finally I had to drop the "speaking" portion of the phrase and I fell into a giggling mass onto a table... which then decided to turn over and land on my leg.

             

A Native Teacher's conversation with three of her students

"CARLRLRLRLRLRMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNAAAAAAA!" Scream from across the playground.  Carmen Teacher stops to wait as three girls come running at her, pony tails flapping behind them, "Calmena, Calmena." One girl screeches as they reach their teacher.

One girl, Sarab, hits the chanting girl, Hyun Su, "Ya!" (Roughly translated to "hey you!") "Calmena Teacher."

Hyun Su: Sorry, Carmen Teacher, sorry. Teacher, sit down pleasuh.

Carmen Teacher (after allowing herself to be pulled down to the grass): How are you?

Hyun Su: Oh Teacher, I ANGRY! (The other girls nod in agreement.)

Carmen Teacher: Why are you angry?

Sarab: Oh Teacher! (large sigh) Today, oh today (really animated and excited), we go to Everlandah!  (amusement park) But Teacher! It rained!

Carmen Teacher: Oh no! That's too bad!

Sumin (the quiet one) points to her shoes and makes motions of being cold: Teacher! Teacher! Rainy! Shoezuh! Cold!

All girls scream with frustration and excitement from the day.

Carmen Teacher: Your shoes got wet and you were cold?

Sumin: Yes Teacher! Cold!

Hyun Su: Teacher! I angry! We no ride roller coaster! We no ride ummm...fun? We no Haunted Mansion! Rain! And Thunder! Why, Teacher, WHY!?!

Sarab: Calmen Teacher! We Haunted Mansion went, but Sooooooooo many people! Line (throwing arms wide).

Carmen Teacher: The line was long.

Sarab: Yessuh! Carmen Teacher, today we happy! Today we go to Everland and then it rain! dtk dtk dtk (rain sound) and then thunder kukuku (thunder sound) and we (making motions of brushing off water--Carmen Teacher cuts in "were wet") no (strange motion--Carmen says "umbrella") Yessuh! And no raincoat! WE angry! Then we eat lunchee at two thirty o'clock...

Sumin hits Sarab: Ya! [Korean Korean Korean Korean] two thirty o'clock no! two thirty, Crazy.

Sarab: Sorry Teacher, two thirty, we eat lunchee. Three o'clock we all meet. Rain stop. But we three O'clock meet, but we go home.

Collective scream of anger.

Carmen Teacher: Oh that is too bad. I am sorry it rained. And now it is sunny. But you did not have to study today.

Hyun Su: But Teacher, I angry. Ok Teacher, you go now. Bye bye!

They all force Carmen Teacher up and push her on her way home. 

"But I don't want to go among mad people" ~Lewis Carroll "Through the Looking Glass"

            If Lewis Carroll were to rise from the dead and come to Korea, he would surely think that someone had created a nation based on his books. Some days, it feels like I tripped and fell through a rabbit hole at some point in time. While nothing is strange, every thing is outlandish. It's like I am Alice at the Mad Hatter's tea party (like having sugared garlic bread and cookies with coffee or eating anchovies with honey and peanuts) or standing next to Tweedledum and Tweedledee.  For instance, upon asking my co-teacher if she attended grad school the night before she replied, "Yes, I got much sleep." I have no idea if she misunderstood me or if she sleeps through graduate school. Signs in the school sport slogans such as "Less speed, more haste."

            Many students call me beautiful because of my blue eyes or red hair or pale skin. But sometimes the residents of Wonderland tell me I am ugly because I look different --because I don't wear bibicream and my freckles show, or because my face is animated.

            Most of the time  I have no idea which direction I am going or what is going on. What I do learn seems to be misinformation or riddles. And like Alice, I follow and listen and never seem to follow my own advice.

            If Korea doesn't reside in the recesses of Lewis Carroll's mind (you are still picturing zombie Carroll aren't you), then perhaps Korea is the Stepford Wives  taken to a whole nation and every family. Perhaps it is the fact that the surface resembled a Stepford Wife similarity and smoothness--as if everyone is a robot in a high-tech 1950s world and when a robot malfunctions it is quite noticeable--but only the non-robots notice it.

            No one seemed to notice when a man calmly walked up to an overweight woman, stuck his head between her breasts and motor boated her and then walked away as calmly as you please--no one that is, except the victim and myself, which we stood transfixed in horror.

            No one pays attention to other people. A man throws his hand out with a cigarette between his fingers, headless of a passerby who might not like to have embers in her eye. A driver will park their in the middle of the lane and walk off to visit with friends, ignoring the line of cars waiting for the parked car to move (which still running).  And when a bicycle rider will not stop his slow-moving bike or turn the bicycle to the large amount of free space, but will instead, ride right into a person and then after the person manages to untangle herself from the bike, the rider falls over the bike. Only then will a bystander calmly say "strangee" and walk away.

            While this may sound depressing, it isn't. It is truly annoying, but at the same time great fodder for blogs and stories. I am gladly compiling incidents to make my own story. Speaking of story, found out today that Anne of Green Gables is quite famous in Korea. She is known not as Anne, but as "the red girl." I don't think the Koreans really like her, as they wouldn't dare call her the "the red girl"-- must be the freckles. They also are fans of Pippi Longstockings (Known as "Pibi") and Thumbelina (known by a Korean name).

            In other news, received some children's English/Korean dictionaries (the kind that has a whole definition, not just the Korean word). I jokingly suggested we can punish the students by making them rewrite a page from the dictionary. My co-teacher said it would be too harsh a punishment. Two  hours later, she shoved a dictionary under some boy's nose and had him rewrite three pages from the dictionary and then made him recite it to her.

            And in case you don't know who Anne is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-OLOl_qPLWc

A Trip to Seoul Grand Park

Another weekend in Seoul as I try to recover from my latest bout of sickness.
Quite tired of the idea of Seoul, and being quite a beautiful Saturday, I suggested a trip to
the Seoul Zoo. I thought this would be a fantastic way to soak up some sun, have some
light exercise, and be able to take it easy and rest whenever I felt tired. So we got onto
the subway and rode the subway just over an hour to Seoul Grand Park. It is a
campground, hiking area, Seoul Land Amusement Park, and a zoo in one large area.

We walked out of the subway straight up to the outer ticket office via a large
walkway that ran between the car park. Green trees, flowering rhododendrons, and lily
bushes hid the cars from view while vendors standing next to folding tables or sitting on
blankets did their best to distract you with rice cakes, roasted silkworm larvae, fish paste
on a stick, and other traditional Korean snacks. Other venders sat by in hope that some
child would demand that their parent buy them large balloons, animal ear headband,
bubble guns, and stuffed animals. Or perhaps, that Ajumas would buy a visor, an Ajushi
would buy a hiking hat, or a young couple might buy matching baseball caps in an effort
to hide from the beating sun. Hiding in the midst of this distinct Korean atmosphere is a
Family Mart and a Dunkin' Donuts. We made it to the tram and were
taken around the lake that separates the park from the rest of the Seoul.

The zoo started out fairly normal. We started at the beginning, in Africa. The
large, wide walkways are lined with flowering bushes, flower displays (local flowers, not
African), and various statues and artworks or animals of Africa. The giraffe area was
kind of nice with a small two-story viewing area. There are no trees or plants. Just a dirt
arena with some poles to hang the feed from, and at the back is a fake rock wall made to
look like a mountain.

This is where it begins to become the weirdest zoo I have ever been to. All of the
animal pens are dirt. No grass. Many of the pens don't have any bushes, flowers, or trees inside the pens to look like a natural habitat. Mostly the pens are areas that
have a central feeding location, a watering area, maybe a couple of rocks and a couple of toys (there are some pens that are the exception). All of the greenery seems to be on the main path.

Most of the pens have a small fence on the path, then a bush, then another fence,
a pit, and then the animal pen. This is fine, but most of the bushes are so tall that you
can't see the animals. There is a tiny bush-free area where everyone groups around to
watch the animals. Like most zoos, Africa gets the biggest amount of attention. Then
there is a bit of Australia, South America, North America, and North Korean animals.

Many of the same type of animal is spread out all over the park. For example, the reptiles can be found in with the apes and in the South American area. The peacocks are in the poultry pavilion as well as a whole peacock village further on in the park. The amphibians can be seen every where. It's as if they get an overflow and have to house them somewhere.

Also, there seems to be more space management issues. The lions can be viewed from the main path, but for some reason the cheetahs are stuck in a pen that cannot be viewed from the path, you look up and you can kind of see a cheetah, but only because he is laying on top of a platform.

As Koreans love museums, there are random buildings throughout the park in which there are various displays of dead animals (it really seemed that the amount of dead animals and statue animals in this park equals the number of live animals). In these buildings there are glass windows where you can look into animal holding cells. These rooms are exactly what I picture Asian prisons to look like (minus the glass window and the moat that separates the animal from the window). The walls are orange or sick-green and covered in feces, the floor is cement and has a bit of hay on it. There is one heavy metal door that has either a small barred window or a sliding window (as if to slide a food tray to the prisoner). Here a zebra or an elephant can be seen pacing the small, florescent-lit space while children press their faces up to the glass.

To further question the humanity of this zoo, the poor large water snakes and
lizards lived in tiny glass cages with a two-foot shallow pool for them to swim in (one water monitor didn't have any water to swim in what-so-ever). The crocs had just enough water to lay in. And the raccoons had a tiny little water fountain to drink from or wash themselves in.

Some days I wonder how people function. Everywhere are signs in both Korean and
English (including a nice picture) that says "Do not cross this fence," or "Do not feed the
animals." And of course people would let their children run under the fence and put their
fingers into the pens. And people would feed the animals while staring at the "Do not
feed" sign.  This was after we watching people take flash photography in the nocturnal-animals building and people taunting the monkeys and raccoons with food or water bottles and other shiny moving objects just to get the poor creatures to run around on the bars.

Despite all of this insane frustration it was a good day. We got to see some of Seoul. I even conquered some of my fear of heights by going on the sky lift over the park. We finished off this exhausting day with a beer, some good Indian food, and some Baskin and Robbins!

New Seoul

The Royal Palace

            Korea is a bit more bearable now that winter coats are replaced with light jackets. The beginning of the month was a succession of rainy days which reminded me of when I first arrived in Korea. But, Andie's visit seemed to have brought out the best in Korea's weather (minus one extraordinarily rainy day). Now it has been sunny with temperatures between 50-70 degrees --I can live with that!

            I was able to meet up with my cousin for a couple of times. I am grateful she was able to fit me in--she has quite a few friends still teaching here. I introduced her to my favorite Jonggak bar and we wandered around Namdaemun Market, Myeongdong, and City Hall together.

            The substitute third grade English teacher has gone now, but we got together for dinner and coffee on the extraordinarily rainy day. We chose that day to walk around Insadong and Samcheong-- which was hiding between Jonggak and the royal palace this whole time! Both neighborhoods have an artsy, coffee shop vibe that is infectious. We wandered around window shopping, drinking coffee, and stuffing ourselves until we were soaked to the bone. We both agreed it was so fun, we had to make a weekly deal of it.

Artsy Samcheong

            My other co-teacher bought me a ticket to one of the first baseball games of the season. So we went together to watch the LG Twins. Honestly, I was not looking forward to this event, but as it turned out I had a great time. The game was exciting and the crowd was fun to watch. With the noise makers, cheerleaders, crowd leader, drums, and special songs for each player the game was more like a musical about baseball. Another game is in store, I can assure you--even though the team lost.

            Matt was buying food when I arrived at my apartment after the game. A very welcome sight on both accounts. I was so excited to share the newly discovered Seoul, that I dragged him out of the apartment at 9:30 on Saturday morning and after the usual weekend Paris Baguette pastries and coffee, we were combing our way through Insadong. Both of us getting a spring in our step and feeling some-what adventurous.

            After exploring, or more like climbing, Insadong, Samcheong, and the hilly old neighborhood of Bukchon, we headed to the island of Yeouido to enjoy the cherry blossom festival. However, there weren't many cherry blossoms and the ones that were there were fast being destroyed by couples and their smart phones. None-the-less we wandered the river bank soaking up the sun.

Crowding around the cherry tree

            Sunday was an eventful day of coffee buying, I finally bought a stove-top coffee pot after the shocking realization that this whole time I have been drinking disgusting instant coffee. It is amazing how much more enjoyable that morning coffee is now! While coffee is much more enjoyable, food has lost it's appeal. Hopefully soon, I will be excited to eat.